36 Comments
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Martin Prior's avatar

I think you’re right. It’s difficult though.

I know one of my biggest strengths at work is that I care. I will think deeply about different issues that arise and try to solve them all. Over the years this has enabled me to rise above people who maybe didn’t care so much.

But I guess our strengths can so easily becomes our weaknesses.

Recently I’ve found too that I’m becoming tired at the thought of work. No longer energised to solve problems but instead feeling overwhelmed but the issues stacking up. I still care but that has now manifested itself in things feeling out of control.

Your point about controlling the controllables is a great start. I do wonder if I need a reset. Some time to gather and go again.

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Coffee Times's avatar

We are only humans and we have different needs and different focus at different stages of life. What motivated us before might be draining us now. If so, it’s time to take a step back to re-evaluate our priorities. Be open to change and be happy with change.

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Michael Mohr's avatar

Work can be glorious and also draining, for sure 🔥❤️

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David Bryson's avatar

Sometimes there comes a point where you have no choice but to slow down.

I have found that out after a stroke now I have to be sensible and pace myself and be realistic about what I can and can't do thankfully I have a supportive workplace, manager and colleagues.

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Coffee Times's avatar

At some point we all have to slow down for one reason or another. And the key is to learn how to do it gracefully and quickly. Don’t let our stubbornness lead us by the nose.

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Livio Marcheschi's avatar

That's so true.

I was just thinking about it, after a tough night yesterday.

In a way, health issues are wonderful, since they clarify what the priority for us is.

If it was not for some unexpected symptoms, I would not have found the courage to quit my job. And went on with my unsustainable approach to work (and life).

And, maybe, never even started to write about my path to balance here on Substack!

Thanks for sharing your story!

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Coffee Times's avatar

Thanks for sharing Livio. Your story resonates. So relatable.

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Shia Surani's avatar

That’s so true. Health issues are blessings in a way because you then at least know what is coming in your way and when it’s time to get rid off

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Coffee Times's avatar

It’s a blessing if you can see it coming. Some people don’t get that luxury and by the time they realised, damage has already been done. I was fortunate to be on the lucky side.

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Shia Surani's avatar

Absolutely

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Livio Marcheschi's avatar

They might turn the many options available into the only one decision to make.

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Michael Mohr's avatar

Right! When we accept and let go, interesting things happen!

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Michael Mohr's avatar

❤️

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Julie Green's avatar

I love the idea of being energized by what you do and not allowing money to control you.

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Coffee Times's avatar

Thanks Julie. I appreciate your comment.

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Dave Karpowicz's avatar

Winston, You are spot on. Slowing down and reevaluating are critical to finding what works for you. D

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Coffee Times's avatar

Thank you Dave. Greatly appreciated.

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Michelle's avatar

Absolutely. It’s so easy to fall into the trap of trying to prove ourselves but it isn’t sustainable. No matter how much we hear the story from others, it seems to be a lesson we have to figure out from experiencing ourselves, a right of passage if you like.

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Coffee Times's avatar

Spot on Michelle. We often have to hit the wall with our own head before we would finally take in the advice that were given to us. Such is life and human nature. We just have to accept we are like that and keep moving on.

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Michael Mohr's avatar

Absolutely 💯

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Shia Surani's avatar

I could relate to this piece as I am still a university student - studying, working part-time and writing. it’s very hard for me to balance all of it together and sometimes in the middle of chaos, It gets difficult to balance life & work.

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Coffee Times's avatar

I envy your youth. What’s important for you now is to experience the world around you. Balance will come after you have explored your world and understand what you need. Only then can you understand your purpose and track the path you are meant to be on.

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Thomas Cleary's avatar

Is there anything I can do about it? That’s always my first question to myself when I confront a problem. If the answer is yes then I make changes accordingly but never in a rush as I’ve found out time and again that I invariably either forget a step or do what’s necessary in a haphazard way.

But if the answer is no it actually comes as a relief to me because the inevitable has to happen. No amount of shouting, screaming, worrying or denial is going to change that. So I have learned to just sit back, buckle up and enjoy the ride.

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Coffee Times's avatar

Thanks for sharing Thomas, you have a practical philosophy toward life, one that many of us has to learn. We all make mistake and often the best approach is to recognise that and seek to improve along the way.

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Michael Mohr's avatar

Yes. The serenity prayer: God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.

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Untrickled by Michelle Teheux's avatar

Who can go a year without income?

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Coffee Times's avatar

Take it as an investment not a loss.

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Untrickled by Michelle Teheux's avatar

No, I mean how does one cover food, utilities, gas, rent/mortgage etc.

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Livio Marcheschi's avatar

What has helped you to get back to work after the sabbatical?

This theme is very present for me and I am wondering if there is something I can apply to my own situation.

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Coffee Times's avatar

Take the time to find yourself. To try new things and get yourself out of your comfort zone. When you are stripped to the core, your true self has nowhere to hide and you will be able to find the real you, the things that matter and the things that don’t. After that what’s left is to pursue only the things that matter.

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Livio Marcheschi's avatar

In short, persist. And have faith.

The two biggest challenges I can think of! 😅

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Livio Marcheschi's avatar

Almost 6 months ago I have written this about developing patience.

I still think I am not there yet ;)

https://livmkk.substack.com/p/developing-patience-in-times-of-uncertainty

Maybe the core is just to take one step at the time, trying out new things, and not to look to far ahead. Just keeping my personal vision in mind, without worrying about the details of whatever is not in close proximity.

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Julie Green's avatar

Find what energies you and makes you excited and chase it! :)

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Livio Marcheschi's avatar

What if chasing what energises you implies a radical life shift, only possible in the long run? ;) Kinda scary to me. And wondering how I can enjoy the journey...

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Coffee Times's avatar

Have faith and take the leap.

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Michael Mohr's avatar

Good points. Work-life balance can be challenging for sure. Many nowadays make work their number one priority and everything comes second to that. That’s a very American phenomenon. Pros and cons to it, but in the end I personally think more cons than pros. Maintaining friendships, spending quality time with spouse/kids, travel for leisure, etc, are all in my opinion extremely important. Also: life is short. Stupidly short.

Michael Mohr

‘Sincere American Writing’

https://michaelmohr.substack.com/

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