Life Is a Process of Hurting And Healing
Inspiration from my weekend movie
I spent the weekend watching the movie “Under the Tuscan Sun.” It is 2003 romantic-drama classic written, produced, and directed by Audrey Wells and starring Diane Lane. It was based on the memoir written by Frances Mayes' in 1996. I saw this movie for the first time, and I was captivated by the plot.
The movie tells the story of Frances Mayes, who lived in Italy after experiencing a low point in her life. It is a story of warm healing: Life is a process of healing and moving forward with unexpected warmth and endless hope. Everyone will have their fair share of tough times and encounters with the magical healing process.
Frances Mayes (Diane Lane) and her husband were both writers. But her husband was far less famous than Frances. After marriage, to support her husband's career, Frances suspends her writing and concentrates on making money to support her family by writing book reviews. When Frances learnt her husband was cheating on her from a writer whom she gave a bad review, her life was turned upside down.
The husband found a lawyer to discuss divorce with her. Although their house was bought with the money Frances earned, according to the local law, half of it was to be given to her husband, and because she had more earning power than her husband, she had to pay her husband alimony. What was more irritating was that her husband's lover adores their house and wants her to leave so that she can get it as compensation.
Disheartened, Frances did not want to be entangled with them and left the house she had worked so hard to manage with only a few boxes of her books. After which, she put up in a cold bachelor's apartment. When someone reaches middle age and becomes divorced with no fixed place to live, you can imagine Frances's mood.
Her best friend Patty was afraid she would be too sad, so she gave her a plane ticket and suggested she travel to Tuscany. She told Frances: Many people have to go through the crossroads of life. It is only their own choice to go somewhere. When people are in a bad mood, it is useless to be depressed, and better to go somewhere for a walk. But Frances was not at all interested in her suggestion.
Back at the apartment, Frances wanted to try writing something but had no inspiration. And this apartment is a gathering place for the divorced. When she first moved in, the agent jokingly said, after knowing that Frances was a writer, "Then you can take over some business of writing suicide notes." The man next door, who was in the process of getting a divorce, was said to be a lawyer, but at night, he cried so hard that she had to knock on the wall to stop it.
She felt that her current life was really bad, and she felt weak just thinking about it...
In fact, not only Frances, everyone will go through difficult times in life. No one has an easy journey in life. For example, this pandemic that lasted for more than two years has impacted so many people; how many have fallen from their peak to the bottom, and how many have experienced hardships such as unemployment and shattered ideals?
After all, impermanence is the norm. If you feel bitter, think of someone who suffers more than you. If you get through this, think of how different you will be. Don't be disappointed about life, there is hope everywhere.
Frances eventually took her best friend's advice and embarked on a journey to Tuscany.
Tuscany was sunny and picturesque, and everything was so alive. On the side of the road, Frances stumbled across an old villa for sale. Out of nowhere, she suddenly wanted to buy it. But the house owner deliberately raised the price, which exceeded Frances's affordability, leaving her disappointed.
But just as she turned around, things turned for the better: a bird poop fell from the sky and landed on Frances' forehead. Seeing this, the owner thought it was a good omen and sold the house to her at a low price. In this way, Frances has her new house.
The villa has been in disrepair for a long time; the grass was overgrown outside the house, scorpions were crawling inside the house, owls came to visit from time to time, and snakes came too...
Fortunately, the agent helped her find a renovation team to help her repair the house. But it seemed that the people in this team were not very professional; knocking and the wall collapsed, installing a wire and the chandelier burned out. Thankfully, these people were genuine, kind, and special.
For example, an electrician was a middle-aged man who was not talkative, always working in silence. After getting acquainted with him, she learned that he used to be a literature professor, but now he had become an ordinary worker, working every day in a job that didn’t fit well, yet he lived contented. Frances was very moved.
As they got along, Frances gradually became friends with them. The neighbours were also friendly and often invited Frances to dinner.
At the Christmas party in town, there were even men who gave her ambiguous and admiring glances. Frances was in a much better mood during her time in this new community.
She resumed her writing, cooking for the workers in her spare time, and gotten more smiles on her face. Everything indicates that Frances' life is gradually returning to the right track.
This is how people are. When you look at the world from a different angle, you will find that the world will also present you with different feelings. The essence of life is the coexistence of hope and disappointment, the coexistence of beauty and ugliness, and what we can do is see hope in disappointment.
So no matter how bad things are today, don't be disappointed in life because there is still hope.
Life is about repairing the boat and sailing the ship at the same time
Frances never dreamed that soon after she came to Tuscany, she would encounter a new love. That day, she went into the city to find an antique store to buy chandelier accessories but met an Italian man on the street who fell in love with her at first sight.
He took her to the beach for dinner and play. The two bathed in the sea breeze and chatted happily. Then the man took her to the house, and the two had a wonderful night.
When they parted, the two were still unfulfilled and reluctant to part, so they made an appointment to see each other on the weekend.
But the sudden visit of her best friend Patty, who was pregnant, made Frances miss the weekend appointment. Frances became lost again though this time, she was able to recover quickly. And her best friend Patty, under the careful care of Frances, walked out of the low of her life and greeted the bright Tuscan sun with her new baby.
Frances also ushered in a new relationship. A handsome American male writer, whose novel Frances had previously edited and critiqued harshly, travelled thousands of miles to Tuscany. The two fell in love at first sight.
Everyone has lived with pain, but many people have learned to heal and be kind to themselves.
Life is a process of hurting and healing. It is this magical process that makes us grow stronger and wiser, without which life has no meaning. If you are feeling hurt right now, please remember you are not alone we have all been there. Believe that once you get over it, you will see the vastness and beauty of life.
“Life offers you a thousand chances... all you have to do is take one.” ― Frances Mayes,
Thank you for reading to the end. I hope you have enjoyed it.
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Beautiful capture of a lovely film. I loved it as well...from many perspectives. Thanks so much for your gifted writing!!
Tanny
I'm going to have to watch this again. Loved your perspective when you wrote, "Life is about repairing the boat and sailing the ship at the same time." That's so true. We often don't get the chance to do "this" and then, do "that."